"You never stopped thinking like a youth minister, did you?" It was one of the most thrilling compliments ever paid to me. We were co-directing a camp together and working on a game. I was having fun thinking about twists and wrinkles. She is a good youth minister--far better than I could have ever hoped to be. She's perceptive, attention, kind in the way that steps past kids defenses and hormones. She has a gift for facilitating games that get kids connecting to each other and energized. I have a gift of facilitating games that fall under the weight of their own complexity or require medical attention. She is gifted in many other ways. And she's not alone. This past weekend I was reminded of just how fortunate our kids are to have a cadre of youth ministers who get it. As best I can tell, the criteria this cadre uses to evaluate a senior minister is the senior minister's capacity to think like a youth minister. I would like her evaluation of me to be true. So, I've named a few things that senior ministers, or at least this senior minister, need to remember about ministry from being a youth minister:
1. Some days really do come down to whether people get sufficient rest and proper hydration.
2. Rigid plans and no plans are both problematic. Plan tight; adhere loose.
3. It doesn't matter how comfortable the minister is praying and reading scripture. It matters how comfortable the people are praying and reading scripture.
4. You can't very well expect to get them to open up to you if you're always sitting with someone else.
5. Neither congregations nor youth groups can be built around the minister's insecurities.
6. Letting people remain unaccountable for destructive behavior is the exact opposite of loving them. Holding people accountable is not punishment.
The biggest thing I see from the good youth ministers I know is that they anticipate seeing God transform the people they serve. They live with the belief that the next worship service, or game, or activity, or conversation, or meal, or message may be the point of transformation for someone. Too many of us stop anticipating transformation. Truth be told, many ministers have never anticipated transformation. These folk do time in youth ministry rather than do youth ministry which is how they do other forms ministry later on. We might defend ourselves saying that we've been at this longer and therefore we have calibrated our expectations to fit reality. That's just another way of saying we've let the calling become a job. Transformation can happen whether we expect it, pray for it, and anticipate it. After all, God doesn't ask our permission no matter how offended we get by that. We can get in the way or miss transformation altogether by failing to look, pray and work for it. So, to my friend who asked if I still think like a youth minister I'd say, only on my best days.
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